Saturday, September 26, 2009

An Open Letter!


I was perusing another blog (allhiphop.com) when I came across a letter written to Alicia Keys from singer Mashonda. I want to post the letter but I must first tell the background. Mashonda is a singer and the wife of producer, Swizz Beatz. Mashonda and Swizz are divorcing and Mashonda says that Alicia Keys is the reason. Alicia Keys and Swizz are now an item. Read the letter:
"After having a great evening with my son and enjoying some fun twit chat, I decided to sign off and get some work done. However, a few hours later I was advised that I should check @aliciakeys twit page (twitter). I've never reached out to her on twitter before. I feel our issues are a lot more serious than a website conversation. Not to mention that I've reached out to her many times in the beginning of this whole thing, as any wife would do. Unfortunately, I never succeeded in getting a response. The 1st time I meet AK, my husband introduced us to each other at an event. ( I have no choice but to call him my husband, until he is not anymore) In the messages that I sent to her (AK), I made it very clear that on the contrary of what she might be hearing, I am still married to my husband, living with him and just had a child. Its been two years and I still have not received a response. What I do receive, is constant displays of selfishness and disconcern to me and my son.

I was a fan of AK's last album, we were both signed to J Records and I always checked up on her projects. I sang her songs and admired her for creating Superwoman and Karma, I would never deny her, her talent. I believed in her until I found out she was possibly sleeping with my husband. The affair was denied by both, until it was finally admitted months later.

Already I can hear some of you saying " why are u blaming her, You cant make someone leave their wife, You cant break something thats broken". Well, my marriage was not broken, as far as I knew we were celebrating our sons birth and getting ready to celebrate our 5 year wedding anniversary . Call it blind love, whatever. I call it being a devoted wife.. As far as me blaming her and not blaming him, thats false. Me and my husband have worked out our differences. We are in a good place as people and as parents. I accept his choices and I am comfortable enough with myself to move on. I am so very blessed in many ways.

My concern with AK is no longer the fact that she assisted in destroying a family but that she has the audacity to make these selfish comments about love and wanting to be with someone, even after knowing their situation. How is this the same Superwoman that I sang out loud with in my truck? I ask myself sometimes.

If you are reading this Alicia, let me start by saying, you know what you did. You know the role you played and you know how you contributed to the ending of my marriage. You know that I asked you to step back and let me handle my family issues. Issues that you helped to create.
Im not saying everything was perfect all the time but no relationship is perfect. We made a vow to God and I believe you should have respected that, as a woman. I know you owe me or my son nothing but I just wish you would've handled things more carefully. I'm not judging you, I put you and the whole situation in the hands of God, the Higher Power. Just know that as a woman, I expected so much more from you. I never had intentions on reaching out to you this way but after reading your twits tonight, and the constant disregard, you left me no choice. I feel that after 1 and a half years of you hiding this affair and acting like it doesnt exist, that now is the time to confront it, since you talk so openly about it now

This is not a publicity stunt, I dont have a record coming out. I just need to close this chapter in my life and that means confronting our issues. There is a small child involved. His dad loves him to death and he wants to spend more time with him but hes afraid because he knows we don't have a relationship. This is my main concern. My son NEEDS his dad and I NEED to be comfortable with you. For him!

I know many will see my point and many will not be able to look into what's real because they only want to see Alicia Keys the celebrity, not the human. This is not for the "people", this is for you. Like I said I was left no choice but to reach out to you this way. By now, Im sure you want to find a balance in this as well.

I read your tweets tonight and I felt they were very insensitive. You have no idea how much pain I was caused because of this affair. Its baffling to me that you don't understand what I might have gone through with this situation. I dont consider myself a victim anymore, Ive learned alot from this! I just ask you to try and be a bit more realistic and delicate to the situation, at least until my divorce is final. I felt me attending the party would have been a starting point for us, since you shook my hand after I offered it, but I suppose I was wrong.

If its so, that you and my husband are meant to be together, then God bless you both and I hope you never have to deal with what I did. I would not wish it on my worst enemy. If you two being together forever is the case, its more of a reason for us to get along, because I'm not going anywhere. Theres a child to be raised.

To answer your tweet, choose smart over spark. Sparks burn everyone, be smart! Its simple actually, just think of the shoe being on the other foot.

Stay blessed and lets work this thing out with respect and dignity."

Ladies, let's make these men show us divorce papers before dating them!

4 comments:

wordswork02 said...

Wow! That is deep! Miss Mashonda put it ALL on the table, didn't she? I could just see her rolling her neck (and her eyes) as she wrote that letter.

I went to Alicia Keys' Twitter page and saw the tweets Mashonda was referring to. In tweet, AK says:

"love is knowin all abt some1, & still wantin 2 b wit thm more thn any other persn. love is trustin the enuf 2 tell thm everythin abt urself,"

But I what happens when the person you love doesn't want to be with you more than his wife? A year and a half? He's been seeing AK for a year and a half? Didn't Mashonda have a baby within that period of time? So that would mean Mr. Swizz Beatz was sleeping with his wife and macking with AK at the same time. Who does he think he is? P Diddy?

And yet AK still loves him, warts and all.

On the other hand, if Swizz Beatz and his wife vowed to work out their problems and he kept creeping back to AK, he obviously wasn't sincere about staying together. Or maybe Mashonda didn't explain that staying together meant sleeping only with her -- the wife.

But I do agree with the part in the letter where Mashonda anticipates people asking why she's blaming AK for the break-up. After all, an affair takes 2 people; Swizz Beatz is just as much to blame as AK, possibly more because he's the one who took vows. AK is free and single and allowed to mingle.

TLUV said...

The entire situation is crappy! Whatever happened to the "girl" code? AK has just as much blame in this situation as Swizz! When are women going to stop putting themselves in these positions? I never want a wife to confront me or write me a letter. If a man isn't going to respect his vows, that doesn't mean that YOU shouldn't! In case you didn't know, Mashonda and Swizz's son is about 2. I think that AK should have respected Mashonda's first meeting and stepped off until the divorce was final.

Anonymous said...

slepping with a married man is wrong on so many levels, hes wrong and shes wrong. i understand how mashonda feels, AK is wrong becuz she knew that he had a family i mean hes married!!!!!! why would u want to sleep with a married man. then be smart about it and make silly smart comments?? AK should have waited until the divorce was over..she been sleeping with this man for almost two years. com on now wheres the respect?? swizz and AK is wrong! i feel sorri for both of them becuz nothing good is gon come from this! wen karma hit oh boy its going to hit hard!
this is pissin me off! how u gon be sleepn with a married man n act like everything is ok..ugh AK n swizz sooo lame for this!

TLUV said...

People do wrong things and then they want to make "new" rules! It don't work that way! If you find yourself in a situation like this, be empathetic for a moment! Like my mother used to say, "But for the Grace of God goes you!" In other words, Mashonda could be you, one day! I am a true believer in karma too!